The Interview: nAz

Tell us a bit about yourself …

Well...

My name is Naz.

I am a 21 year old Muslim currently studying Theology and working part time for a charity within fundraising. I am hoping to become a teacher at either college lev el or secondary school level. I may just do secondary school just for the challenge

I would call myself British unlike some other people who were born in this country but have Pakistani/Indian/Arab etc family. My parents are both from Pakistan however they moved when they were young so they understand the western way of life, I guess.

I’m not the most confident person in the world and I am actually very shy when I first meet someone however when I do get in my comfort zone I can open up and be more comfortable.
I love music and films. I tend to mainly listen to rap/hip hop tracks but can listen to anything that quality whether it is rock, rap, dance etc.

I have a fiancé who I intend to marry and I love her to bits. I have been with her for 2 years this Tuesday (sexy time)

Did I see you join a facebook group that involved telling your girlfriend to make you a bacon sandwich?
Did I? Wait, let me check.

Ahhhh. I see now. It was this group. http://www.facebook.com/#/group.php?...6087674&ref=ts
That group pwns imho.

Do you like cheesy Wotsits?
Okay. I don’t know how to answer this tbh.
If we are talking literally, then yeah I like.
If we are talking about some sort of sick sex joke or something I would go for the answer that makes me seem the most gay.

Why Liverpool?
I think I have explained this on the board before.
Basically when my parents and uncles and aunts moved to this question, they came in the 70’s and 80’s and at that time Liverpool dominated and they were the team that got my family into watching football and ever since then all my family has supported Liverpool since then.
Whether or not you think I’m just an out of towner glory hunter or some ****, I honestly couldn’t give a ****.

What's your best memory of a game you were in attendance at?
I’m not going to lie and act like I have been to many games however there was one memory that sticks out when I went to Anfield for the first time watching a premier league game. It was when Crouch scored his first ‘goal’ for Liverpool. It was great because the crowd just wanted him to score so badly and everyone went ballistic when he scored and watching him run the pitch because carra wanted him to jump in the kop. He got knackered at before he could reach it from the other side

Fowler or Torres?
Fvck me, tough choice.

Footballing wise? I would say Torres. He is a brilliant player and a joy to watch. There are not many players to say the least at Liverpool that give you that WOW factor and always seem to amaze you. Torres is that player. Even when you think he has had a sh1t game and he is out of sorts...BANG, a moment of genius that wins you the game or once chance and one goal.
However, in terms of like fan favourite, I would have to go for Fowler. He was my first footballing hero that I looked up to and his love for the club is amazing like the 4 times hand gesture he did to the Manchester United fans....brilliant. Also, he is left footed like me and I score goals like him all the time when i go football and I score all the goals and maradona once scouted me and would have played me in the argentina squad if i were argentinian.

Be honest, what are your views on interfaith dialogue and the treatment of other religions in Islamic states?
I’ll be honest. I have no idea of how much interfaith dialogue there is in Islamic states. However I am guessing there is a minimum amount which is not a good thing. One thing I appreciate about the west is the freedom to practise religion. I mean even in Muslim countries I am unable to practise my religion the way I wish. For example when I went to Saudi, I was nearly arrested for worshipping in my own way. It’s a crazy world we live in.

Interesting fact, now, ass fag.
About myself? If so, I have memorised half of the Holy Quran off by heart.
In general- When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.

I need love advice, can you help, I met a girl on Monday, after chatting and getting her digits a name, and a date with me tomorrow at 9 we went for a drink on Tuesday, now she wants to do something on Wednesday, what would you suggest?
Anal rape FTW

Seriously though. Go out to eat or coffee or shisha or something lol. I don’t know why anyone on here would want advice from a virgin but I guess you don’t know much about her so I think this kind of thing would be better than a movie because you can talk. I don’t know if that makes sense.

If you get married to this woman, i wanna invite to the wedding otherwise im going to take my testicles and rub them all over your cats vagina.

Best childhood memory?
Going to Pakistan when I was young. I loved it there, the culture, the traditions and also seeing my extended family. The weather is great; the people are amazing and friendly. I used to go swimming everyday in a local dam. I got really attached to Pakistan and when I left I was in tears, I wish I could go back.

You seem to be pretty devout in your Islamic faith. Tell us about your background. Were you always this way or what made you become so? Do you come from a family background that was very religious?
Well, my parents have been devout Muslims ever since I can remember and they have brought up their kids in a very good Islamic household. Making sure I got a good normal education as well as an Islamic education. When I was younger I would go to school from your normal 9-3 and then straight after I would go to the local mosque to memorise the Quran from 4.30-9.00pm.
I’m not going to lie; this was a very dark period in my life. I was actually depressed and I this was in the ages from 10-15. I would get beat up at the local mosque whenever I would make mistakes in my memorisation of the holy Quran. I was constantly drained and had no energy because i would go from Monday to Saturdays.

I eventually quit the class near the end of my gcse’s and concentrated on my normal education. That day was a momentous occasion even though my parents were still upset I hadn’t completed the Quran

Sorry if I have rambled on a bit in this question but fvck it, this is MY interview. I could go on and on about the threshold of a donkey when a monkey sticks its foot up its ass if i wanted but Im not into that ****.

You don't live near Liverpool yet support the only top four side not to win EPL title, conscious decision, or epic fail?
hahahaha

I don’t give a **** tbh. I have a feeling that when Liverpool do finally win the title (I HOPE TO LIVE TO SEE THE DAY LOL) that I may lose my interest in football after that because its like when you love the chase of getting a girl. Once you got her, you’re like **** this ****. Does you get me homedawg?

Can you tell us a bit about Sufism (I know we all have wiki) and how do you relate to that sect of Islam? Through parents or individually? id imagine you are Sunni from birth anyway. id imagine you're Punjabi then.
Sufism is a complex and broad subject. However the best way I can describe Sufism is to say that it is the spiritual aspect of Islam. To live a life in a state or trying to achieve asceticism and to prepare more for the next world rather than concentrating on this world and thinking that you will live forever.

I relate to Sufism through my parents and have studied it myself individually; it has always been something that helps me.

I would say one of the main benefits of Sufism for myself has been to look at difficulties and hardship as a test from God and to always remember the perceptiveness of this world and that the next world is the one we must prepare for.

Any hobbies?
Playing football and I used to be big into bike riding but haven’t been going for a long time. Maybe when the weather picks up

Ignorance is born through lack of knowledge, but the knowledge is there, why don’t people acknowledge it?
Maybe it isn’t because they don’t acknowledge the knowledge. It may be because they misinterpret it or may even be that their mind is deceitful, locking off that knowledge through a mental block to protect them from the harshness of reality.

If you could get rid of one member, who would it be?
No one really. There is no one that doesn’t contribute in some way to this site.

When are you getting married?
Soon. I am praying for this summer. It would most likely happen early august God willingly and everyone is invited

I had to do some convincing to my parents as I am marrying outside the family which is the norm within my culture. It has taken two years to convince them and now we are looking to arrange it in the summer.

If I was going on a holiday to Pakistan, where would I go and what would i do?
There is a lot of culture in Pakistan and some beautiful Masjids to visit. The best place I visited was Lahore. It has a bit of the night life and it has a lot of beautiful mosques there which I visited. Ive also been to Islamabad where Faisal Masjid is which is pretty impressive.

However, i love it because I lived within my families village and experienced a different lifestyle which is what I look for when I go abroad and was why I hated Dubai. It sucks.

What do you think of Sultan? do you think his hate of Islam is now becoming an act, he’s putting on a show? its like he’s trying to hate islam even more than he really does, do you agree?
I don’t like the guy. I think he is a hypocrite of the highest order. Fair enough, he left Islam. I have no problem with that. The guy talks like he is Gods gift to mankind and that his opinion is only valid. Atheists talk of how religious people should respect their beliefs, however with someone like him it is very hypocritical because he blasts other people for having certain beliefs.

When he isn’t discussing religion, he’s ayt.

In your view, do you view Sufism as the best 'face' for Islam to put forward in terms of opening up dialogue with the West and promoting cultural harmonization between different cultural groups?
Yes, very much so. Sufism is the way forward. It is the sect of Islam that doesn’t have any sort of radicalism. It is kind of like our Buddhism. It promotes peace and it focuses on the individual which is what Muslims need to focus on at the moment. For me, Sufism is Islam and there are aspects of Sufism in most religions and most Sufis don’t have any problem with living in the west and respect this country unlike the people from Islam4uk.

What is your favourite place that you have travelled to and why?
Madina in Saudi Arabia. More specifically, the Mosque of the Prophet Muhammad. I have never felt more spiritually at ease than when I am there. It is amazing to feel the difference between Makkah (where the Ka’aba is) and Madina. It is the most peaceful place.

After them I would say Mafia Island just off Tanzania, amazing place with amazing people. Syria was also brilliant because of the people, just friendly and very accommodating.

Do you believe Liverpool will finish in the top 4?
I don’t think we will. The squad is very poor and out of form and I believe that teams like Man City and Tottenham have more in their locker. Also, these two teams look like they mean business this year.

Watching Liverpool play is worse than stabbing yourself in the eye at the moment.

What's your stance on Sufi-influenced spiritual organizations that have sprung up in non-Islam countries that, even though they are not in any sense a Muslim organization of any sort, incorporate many of the teachings and spiritual methodology of Sufism in their outlooks? Do you think that cheapens Sufism and is an insult to the faith?
I don’t believe it cheapens Sufism at all. Many people argue that Sufism isn’t even something that is Islamic but is universal. I don’t believe that myself however I do not think it cheapens Sufism and I believe people can use it by any medium they wish to as long as long as it benefits them.

Obviously I do wish more people become Muslim Sufis but if it did help them in some way that is always a positive thing.

If you could travel anywhere where would you go and why?
Morocco. Because its a beautiful country with so much heritage and culture. Plus its an Islamic country which would mean all the food halal

There have been, many comparisons and contradictions to yourself and the boxer Naseem hamed. Both very small and skinny, both called Naz, one is a Prince, ones a Queen. Are you handy in a fight?
hahaha. Interesting question to say the least. Im not skinny by the way but I can be your queen

Im not the type to get into fights to be honest. Im a very non confrontational kind of person and I don’t think I would do well in a fight.

The last fight I had was with my older brother in which both of us were losers

Im a lover...not a fighter.

Favourite non scousers player and why?
In the team now?

Has to be Torres for obvious reasons. I also loved Alonso when he used to play for us

Who do you hate more? Everton or Manchester United.
Manchester United.Everton is more of a local thing and I don’t know many Everton fans in real life tbh. United fans are fvcking everywhere and each one talks more **** than the last when it comes to football and all the ones I know CANNOT take banter at all.

The ones on this site are brilliant though.

Does it ever piss you off that Anfield is full of these johnny come lately fans who don't live in the City and have no real link to the club, keeping honest local fans like yourself at home or behind your keyboard, forced to watch some stream in Indian or a language you don't understand?
It really does piss me off. All these foreigners coming into our country, taking our women, taking our jobs, eating our curry, drinking our tea.

Deport them all back to Pakistan I say.

Are you the Liverpool fan who's a virgin?
Yup. Virgin by choice not by looks like half the guys on this site. (sleeping with hookers doesn’t count RM)

What's Naz rocking on his Ipod when he's down the street?
Mainly Rap and Rnb. Im listening to a lot of Chamillionaire at the moment, I think he is a real good on topic rapper and just a mixture of all the latest tunes really.

How is it as a British member of islam in the UK do you ever feel like the stereotypes hold you back?
Not much tbh. Im not the type to complain about it or feel like Im being held back by stereotypes. There are many different challenges in life that come in different forms that different types of individuals have to come across and get past. If you let **** like that hold you back, you will not get far in life.

How strict are you on religion?
I used to be very strict. I remember back in school and a part of college life, I wouldn’t even speak to girls because of religion and i used to pray 5 times consistently a day. I used to be at the mosque reading quran after school for around 4 and a half hours a day.

At this moment of time, my religion has fallen a lot and I hope to get a spiritual recharging and will be hoping to perform the pilgrimage of Hajj this year insha Allah (God willingly)

If you could bring back one member, who would it be?
I wouldn’t say this member has gone but I would like to see Killah start posting in here again. I speak to him often on msn and he’s a top bloke and someone I can relate to a lot.

What are your views on Sha'ria law? Specifically as relates to the treatment of women?
I believe it is fair. I also believe that Islam empowers women and does not oppress them at all.

Firstly look at the Quranic passage ‘there is no compulsion in religion’

Not only does this mean that we must force everyone to become a Muslim but it also means that even performing religious acts cannot be forced on a person. They have to want to do it. For example, the wearing of the scarf. If a Muslim woman doesn’t want to do it then that is up to her, there is no oppression like many mistaken there to be.

Islam gave women rights at a time where female babies were being buried alive. Just look at the rights of wife within marriage.

You are having 5 forum members over for dinner and some fun. Who is coming and why?

SMG316- He is one of my favourite members on this site and me and him hit off from the get go. I think he is someone that I would get along with in ‘real life’ as well. And I can cuss him for bein Indian and he can cuss me for being a Pakistani

Killa- The guy cracks me up with some of the stuff he comes out with in msn convos and it would be good to chill with.

Bossanova- I find him to be the most interesting person on this site and he comes out with a lot of funny ****. He can also ramble on about this bird that he fancies.

The Big Easy- He is just a loveable guy. Never really noticed him much before but he would be good to go out with and he can take the piss out of me for the whole ‘FA Cup Draw’ thread

RCKB- Even though he has had a lot of stick lately. I don’t believe he is a racist at all but I like him and think he would bring out the devil within me lol

Have you had enough of the snow yet?
No- I cant get enough. It makes everything look ever so pretty
winter>summer any day of the week.

Big Freeze in football, don’t you think it was a bit of a over-hyped crap all these games getting called off?
Not really, you can always reschedule and the safety of people is lot more important than some football game. Postponing a football game is better than having someone die in a car accident or something like that.

Interview compiled by Lil Yiddo with questions submitted by members of Soccer 24-7.

Member Interviews: grobbelaargate

Tell us a bit about yourself...
I'm Sean Facer. Aged 25. 6ft tall and weighing in tonight at 14st. Live with my mother, but looking to change that within the next year. I work for plastic moulding company which is a shithole and I've been wanting out for a while but sadly in this day and age, it's not a choice so work my way up the ladder I try until something better comes along. I don't get up to much in the week besides work. I love music, reading football autobiographies on a rare day and I'm developing skill in Italian cuisine. At the weekend, it's time with my girlfriend, who I've been with for 19 months and counting.

My first Wolves game I went to see was against Notts County in December 1994. We won 1-0, Bully was the scorer and it was John De Wolf's debut that day too. I've been a regular season ticket holder for fifteen seasons and I'm considering it making it the final season seeing as we're at the top.

If you could sign anyone for Wolves, who would it be?
Michael Essien (not Mancienne for you dyslexics out there). He can do almost anything with great efficiency. Defend, tackle, pass, attack, score, run from box-to-box and he has a great physical conditioning. More valuable than Drogba, Lampard and Terry combined. Closest player to resemble Duncan Edwards.

So, its snowing. Do you want to come and make a snowman and some snow angels with me? It would be pretty cool.
Why not? Love snow angels. Love making huge snowballs as well. Would be cool indeed.

What's your political views?
Labour through and through. Even though I'm slightly disillusioned by this government restricting our freedom of choice. Still better than having the Tories and that phonie David Cameron in though. So in a nutshell, I'm left-wing.

Have you even been arrested?
No. Had aspirations to be arrested for being too merry though.

Why is Craddock your favourite player?
He's been a sensational performer over the last few seasons and I dread to think where we would be without him. Last season - for me - emphasised his importance to the team. We had Neill Collins in the team and we just brought in Christophe Berra and we leaking goals for fun and then we dropped Collins and Craddock stepped in and we've been keeping clean sheets or conceded just the one goal every game. If wasn't for him, we would be stuck in the CCC, or worst, be the whipping boys of the Premiership. I wasn't expecting him to be a starting regular this season but was expecting a new contract as 'thank you'. And he's a top fella too. Does a lot of charity and community stuff. A club legend in my eyes

What wrong with your club's badge, it looks like a disney icon.
Disney icon? You think so? I always thought it looked like one of those blocks you see on that old quiz show Blockbusters. I must say, it does look minimalist, looking at it. My good friend Nes does some great artwork. Ask upon request and I reckon he'll display

I was at the game where the woman got hit by a firework, I'm convinced it was an assassination attempt on the Premiership's greatest ever striker, why do Wolves dislike Shearer so much and are there any plans to greet Craig Bellamy in the same manner?
I think the fans dislike Shearer because of what happened in that game. Shearer lunged in with two feet on Lee Naylor and referee Steve Bennett gave him a talking to whereas minutes later, Naylor was pulling Shearer's shirt, nowhere to go anyway, Bennett books Naylor. It's either that reason or that Lescott had Shearer in his pocket in that great FA Cup tie the season before.

I think the fans hate Bellamy a bit more just for the fact that he's had a bit of a ill-disciplined past. A good seeing to from Kevin Muscat when Bellamy was at Norwich won't forgotten easily.

Who was your idol as a child and why?
Peter Schmeichel. I was inspired by him to play goalkeeper and tried to emulate him in every single way but dye my hair blonde and have a red nose. A lot of kids mocked my shouting and my way of spreading my body out. **** them. I stopped them from scoring.

What's your favourite holiday destination?
I love to go back to Barcelona again. Beautiful weather, great football, beautiful sites and views to see. I wanted to stop forever rather than just the week.

Are you aware of the past of the Wolves fans on this forum and the association of madness?
Nes mentioned this forum to me and he does tell me of the nutters that were on here, past and present. Some like Woof and Norwolf remain thank goodness.

How do you rate England’s chances in the World Cup?
A better chance than last time, and the only two things that's changed since 2006 is the management and discipline. Very highly just by looking at how the tournament has panned out, we should make the semis with ease, permitting we're at full strength. Got one or two weak links in the team but I'm confident that we can overcome this to stand a good chance.

Shag, marry, kill? Shakira, Rihanna, Cheryl Cole.
Rihanna - kill - I can't be dealing with someone/something that says the last two syllables of every single sentence.

Shakira - shag - But she's gott a shut the **** up though.

Cheryl Cole - marry - She deserves better. I am better.

Have you ever broke a bone?
Nope. Had a curly wurly finger for a week though. Why it didn't break is beyond me.

Do you like sombreros?
I love them. I went to Madrid and Barcelona but I never had the chance to go out and buy one. Next time, eh? And a moustache to boot, yah?

Whats your alcoholic weapon of choice?
Can of Budweiser. It tastes better of the can than the bottle. First choice every time I'm out on the tiles.

Do you like Cheesy Wotsits?
Nah. Space Raiders FTW!

Are there any users you just simply think are idiots?
Upon my short time here, I haven't had much time to judge who's an idiot to be honest. But two names springs to mind are Akira and Calean. OTID and Sniper were tools too. Good calls on getting rid.

Give me your 5 track album of 2009
Grizzly Bear - Fine For Now
John Frusciante - Dark/Light
The Decemberists - The Rake's Song
The Horrors - Sea Within A Sea
**** Buttons - Surf Solar

A curry and a pint of ice cold lager....heaven eh?
Oh yes! Chicken jalfrezi, peshwari naan, can of Bud. MWAH!

You’ve become quite a popular member in a short space of time, how are you finding your new found fame?
I'm handling it alright. Bit overwhelmed when I looked that MvM results and see that I've beaten someone like Foley who is a decent bloke and has been on this forum for years. To be honest, I couldn't imagine myself having such status once I joined but there's some great people on this forum and there's been so many great threads that it's made me stick around here for much longer.

We've all seen your penis, does this embarrass you?
Not really. It's all about efficiency over size for me. It's like comparing Maradona to Heskey. Which is the more effective? I'll leave it for you to decide.

What's your idea of a culinary treat?
Post-match pakoras and samosas

Even though West Brom yoyo, would it be right to say they're a better side than Wolves?
To be honest sometimes I watch West Brom in the CCC and wished we could play that kind of attacking football. But to answer to the question, they have had the upper hand on us in recent years and why not as they've got a good group of players themselves

January. One in, one out … Name them.
Out - Wayne Hennessey - cash him in for big money before he exposes himself as an average keeper.

In - Benni McCarthy - We don't have time for SEB getting there and if Doyle gets crocked, we're doomed. Proven goalscorer at this level is sorely needed.

Is Calean an idiot or misunderstood?
Idiot. From what I've seen, the boy is not right in the head. The power of Christ has corrupted him.

If you could kill anyone and get away with it who would it be?
Simon Cowell. He's made millions by making karaoke singers look like superstars before spitting the flavour out of them. Since when was singing for 2 minutes for once a week live with all the poxy choreography in the world made an artist great? Plus if I kill him, ITV won't have a leg to stand on. I'll kill him by having him and myself with a baseball bat in my hand so he won't know what's coming.

Same question but say if it was a 24-7 member.
Akira. His knowledge of football is poor. And I'd kill him the same way as Cowell.

Do you remember your "first time"? Was it special?
Christmas Eve last year. I'd say it was. We've been wanting to do it for a bit but something always had to crop up. So glad we did and glad it was with someone I had feelings for.

So you support Wolves, what I want to ask you is, which type is your favourite. Is it Grey Wolf, Tundra Wolf, Arctic Wolf?
Grey Wolf. Scary as hell.

What is your greatest Wolves' memory?
Beating Charlton 3-2 two seasons ago. I watched it on the big screen in a pub in town. The atmosphere was awesome and when SEB scored that amazing goal to make 2-1, the place erupted but when Karl Henry made it 3-2 in the 94th minute, the city could hear the pub scream from the rooftops and I was buzzing so much I felt like a kid at Christmas. I stopped in town afterwards, got pissed, yet I was still buzzing. Got home at 3am and still buzzing, didn't go to sleep until 8am.

If you had the chance to go into space, would you?
If you guarantee my return, then yes. Going into space isn't a big deal as much as it was years ago.

What runs but never walks, has a mouth but never talks?
An Ethopian athlete.

What’s your best podcast on your iTunes?
Don't do podcasts. Don't have the time for them.

What's your favourite smiley? Share it with us.


So we’re halfway through the season (almost), how do you fancy your chances of staying up?
Very likely, we've finally got a team that's playing week in, week out and getting used to each other's game. I think another striker is sorely needed. Without Doyle, we won't look like scoring.

If your a wolves fan.. why the name grobbelaargate?
At the time prior to joining I was a bit fixated with the matchfixing scandal back in the 1990s, particularly with Bruce Grobbelaar's case as he sued The Sun and was awarded compensation only to be counter-sued and left bankrupt. And I was struggling for a name at the time too. I love to change it now but I'm known by it by a lot of people now so I'm sticking with it.

Tell us about your career. What do you do? What does your job role include?
Career? What career? I did rotten in school so I went straight to college and did NVQs in Business Administration. Managed to get Level 2 but could not get a job in the office/admin field so I'm sticking it out in a factory for the time being. I seem to have lost my career drive over the last few years.

I've been doing a variety of roles over the last few months. Been toolsetting on laser-marking machines, been doing some material handling and I've been packing mouldings, which is boring. Dunno whether I wanna stick it out here and try moving up the ladder or look elsewhere.

What do you want for Christmas?
Peace on earth and a jazzmaster.

Is the Molineux ever gonna have the corners filled in?
Steve Morgan has mentioned doing the stadium as a whole ie getting the fans closer to the action, filling in corners etc. I think he'll get around to doing it as soon as our Premiership status is stable.

Sith or Jedi?
Chewie. I don't follow Star Wars, but Chewie looks awesome.

Have you ever needed stitches?
Once back in 2003. I was walking - sorry, staggering - back from a notorious pub that has since seen a few friends of mine get glassed or the **** kicked out of them. A bunch of guys got out of a car and beat me down. Luckily enough, instinct got me to put my hands over my head and I got kicked in the ribs, hands and fingers, all bruised at the end of the beating, fingers and hands more so. Still managed to have a few nasty blows to the head. I required 12 stitches in the back of the head.

What’s your views/opinions of the females on the forum?
Yiddo - Top lass of the class. Friendly, talks a really good game, gets along with everyone.

Barcelinha - Decent poster when she pops in the EPL section. Great taste in music.

Ruudlover - United through and through. Don't see her much outside the United forum but she's alright.

In all honesty they're stark contrast to the females who I talk to about football. They can't talk a good game to save their lives.

That's all the females I know of on here so if I missed you out, I apologise, unless your name is Clare Balding.

Are you travelling home and away with Wolves whilst they play their football in the Premier League?
I can't be arsed to travel away to be honest. I'm taking a page out of Geesus' book not deciding not to bother after he went to watch us get demoralised 5-1 against Blackburn when we were in the Premiership first time around.

What's your biggest fear?
Although I'm slowly overcoming it, it's heights. My girlfriend dragged me to Pleasure Beach a few weeks ago. Good money to hear me scream my ass off on the Pepsi Max. Lost my voice halfway through.

Are you a Facebook kinda person or is it Twitter for you?
Facebook. I do my best to have time for Twitter though.

Have you bought your tissues for after you get knocked out the FA Cup against Tranmere?
I have indeed Scoot. I'll be needing them whilst I'm eating my curry whilst watching us stuff the jingle bells out of your lot.

Do you play football if so, what position and what’s on your pre-match iPod selection?
I do, though it's just a big kickabout with the lads if it's all arranged. I play goalkeeper, but recently have been trying my luck in a number of positions.
As for a pre-match playlist it's very much the same as what I play before I go out on a matchday...

Jeff Wayne - Eve of the War
Talking Heads - Crosseyed And Painless
Jorge Ben - Ponta De Lança Africano (Umbabarauma)
Liars - Plaster Casts Of Everything
Radiohead - The National Anthem

How many fingers am I holding up?
Orange?

The day Wolves got promoted, how did you feel?
Not as ecstatic as most fans as sensed it was gonna happen weeks prior to the QPR game. Still very chuffed though.

Who do you think will finish in the top 4?
Right now Man Utd and Chelsea are shoe-ins. It's up in the air for the two spots. I reckon Villa will have the mileage and the squad this time around. Arsenal will be there and abouts with or without Van Persie. Liverpool seem to have a habit of finishing seasons strongly over the years but their squad has weakened for the losses of Arbeloa, Hyypia and Alonso, despite the arrivals. Spurs are a good side who will be lurking around but they need to start beating big scalps to be certain of a place. Man City has the advantage of having the resources on their side, but whether it'll be used wisely remains to be seen. But if Mancini identifies the problem behind the leaky defence, they're a serious contender.

Who do you think will get relegated?
At this point and time...

Pompey - they have a chancer for an owner and have spent nothing on players and it wouldn't surprise me if the last of their star players left.

Hull - A sitting duck without Jimmy Bullard and Geovanni looks like a different player from the one that wooed me.

Third spot can be anyone from 12th downwards. Hard to tell.

Thank you and Merry Christmas!

Interview compiled by Lil Yiddo with questions submitted by members of Soccer 24-7.